Hey everyone. I was looking threw an old memory book and look what I found. They're old prom cards of Maria's. She'll argue different, but I know she had a good time.

Hey I'm back wih some updates. The whole group met up a few weeks ago for Thanksgiving. We met up at the Evans' summer home in Hunington Beach. I've only been there once before when I was about 10ish. It never disapoints. Max and Liz had already been there a couple of days with thier new son Michael Alexander Evans. The day of Maria and me showed up first thing in the morning to help cook. Isabel and Jessy showed up at about noon. Same with Kyle. Mr and Mrs Evans, Amy and Jim, and the Parkers showed up laterin the day. It's so rare that we're all in the same place it was sureal. Maria really enjoyed it though. A little bit to much maybe. All she can talk about is little Michael. She asked me if maybe we should have a little Michael of our own.Of course I would love to but the time isn't exactly ideal. Then theres the whole raising a gifted child talk. And would our situation be stable enough. After talking it over though we've decided to go for it. We've decided to have a baby. I'll keep you all updated on all the developments.

I know you've been waiting a while for that diary entry. Maria's I mean. I've been glancing through it and even though there were entries that were more exciting or hot and heavy I picked this one because it meant alot to me. To both of us really. She wrote this right before I was emancipated. I was in a foster home. I used to move from home to home alot. Well this night I had a fight with my foster dad. one of many actually. That night I decided I couldn't stay there any more. I decided I wouldn't stay in a foster home ever again.

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It's only fair. I went to him when I needed help with our little problem, and he did help me. Granted he was a little weird afterwards and I have been avoiding him since, but the important thing is he needed comfort and he came to me.

So justice is served, right? You scratch my back; I'll scratch yours. That's all it is, isn't it? It doesn't mean anything, right?

Oh who am I kidding? Michael Guerin is asleep in my bed at this very moment, and all I want is him. I don't care that we messed up before, that I could have been pregnant. What we felt that night at the Crashdown, it was... special. I wouldn't have let it go so far if Michael didn't mean something to me. And he means so much.

I know it now that I haven't been around him. He's been asking Liz about me, but I told her to be evasive. There wasn't any need for him to feel obligated to talk to me now that our crisis was over. But that was so stupid. You can't deny what your heart wants. And when it speaks to you, you have to listen.

Like tonight. My head was saying no. Really loudly. But I could see that he was upset about something. And rather than run to Max or Isabel, he came to me. He needed me. How could I turn him away knowing how much it must have killed him to open up even that tiny bit?

Michael has this tendency to hide in plain sight. You know what I mean? You can see it on his face that he's been hurt, but he'd never admit to it. He'd go around the subject until you dropped it. That's why it means so much that he came to me- it's like an admission that he needs someone. Needs me.

It gives me a little bit of hope. That someday we'll break that stone wall of his down completely. That is if he doesn't go right back to shutting me out again tomorrow. He needs to drop his act and admit he feels something for me. I have to do the same I guess. We're both too used to keeping hidden inside our forest of doubt and denial. With everyone else, it's like we're wearing camouflage to keep out of sight, blend in with the trees and shrubs. But with each other... well I could pick him out of the brush a mile away. He needs me, and I've finally realized how much I need him. Poetic justice that two such self-reliant people need one another so badly, isn't it?

He's asleep now, but he was crying before. I don't know what happened, but I know that he wouldn't have come here if he didn't trust me. Didn't want me to be the one to help him. I brush the damp hair away from his forehead and place a soft kiss there in its place. It's a promise, my promise, that one of these days, we'll work it out, and we'll get to be together. And it's an admission. That I need and want him, too. An admission that it's time to put away our camouflage.